Why are you asking?

There was an altar call at church today, for people who wanted vision (for the future). I've been feeling particularly out of place of late, so I went up. I got nothing, and when I asked why, God said, "Why are you asking? You already know what to do, go do it!"

This is the truth, I know where I'm going right now. God has made the road abundantly clear and stuck big signposts in my face. That doesn't make it easier for me to accept. Right now, I'm just really hoping and trusting that God will complete the changes needed for me to actually walk this way. I may not be the biggest, best, greatest Christian with a huge heart for others... but I want to follow God with all my life, no matter the price.

Something that has been plaguing me recently is authority, where does it come from? Where does it go? Who determines it. Most people, especially in our society, will say you have to build authority by building respect in your followers. This just doesn't ring true for me - some people do this, and others are naturally respected. I would say that authority is only ever given from above. A prince cannot accede the throne if his parents do not recognise him... a pastor cannot lead if God does not will it. My own gifts, although given to develop and use, are ineffective outside the area God leads me. Fortunately, the bounds of my own gifts are becoming clearer as the time approaches to use them.

Strangely, this somehow does not satisfy. I am not happy with just the gifts I have been given, because although they are great they will eventually become my limits. Even as I climb this hill, I have my eyes fixed on the mountains ahead. Maybe one day I'll be the speaker on the stage, in front of a crowd of hundreds or thousands.