forged in suffering, perfect in weakness, fuelled by love.
my mind is just blown away right now. Over the past month or two I've just experienced the most amazing growth in every area of my life. My capacity to handle stress, my social skills, my confidence.... it's like I've just been given the keys to a hotrod or something.
I'm changing and I can feel it in a big way, on a daily basis. It's like emerging from a chryssalis and discovering you have wings. I can't wait till I can fly. This growth isn't something random, or something overbearing. It's something I needed, and something I asked God for. I couldn't live with being a shadow any more, I have to be everything I can be and the only way I can be that is through God.
This growth hasn't sprung from outside factors or pressures, hasn't come from depression or even a desire to better myself. I'm going to change the world, and God is going to show me the way to do it. That's a powerful revelation, and a vision that drives me forwards daily. How can anyone be unhappy when they have a destiny that big?
I see other people around me now, people who were like I was. They still desperately crave the acceptance of others, not realising that it's themselves they can't accept. It's sad, because they know God but they don't know God's heart. It's not acceptance from others you need, it's confidence that you yourself can become someone great that you need, and that confidence can only come from God.
I thought most of this transformation was internal, that people didn't really notice and that on the outside I was changing slowly. Tonight, one of my friends told me he was really impressed by how much I'd grown in God over the past 4 weeks. I was pretty shocked, and I still am. That someone noticed the change was exciting and encouraging. That they noticed the cause, that was something special.
So here I am, waiting for my wings to unfold. I can't go forwards under my own power; I'm completely dependant on God. I never want to go back to who I was, living in this new knowledge of God is just incredible.
I'm changing and I can feel it in a big way, on a daily basis. It's like emerging from a chryssalis and discovering you have wings. I can't wait till I can fly. This growth isn't something random, or something overbearing. It's something I needed, and something I asked God for. I couldn't live with being a shadow any more, I have to be everything I can be and the only way I can be that is through God.
This growth hasn't sprung from outside factors or pressures, hasn't come from depression or even a desire to better myself. I'm going to change the world, and God is going to show me the way to do it. That's a powerful revelation, and a vision that drives me forwards daily. How can anyone be unhappy when they have a destiny that big?
I see other people around me now, people who were like I was. They still desperately crave the acceptance of others, not realising that it's themselves they can't accept. It's sad, because they know God but they don't know God's heart. It's not acceptance from others you need, it's confidence that you yourself can become someone great that you need, and that confidence can only come from God.
I thought most of this transformation was internal, that people didn't really notice and that on the outside I was changing slowly. Tonight, one of my friends told me he was really impressed by how much I'd grown in God over the past 4 weeks. I was pretty shocked, and I still am. That someone noticed the change was exciting and encouraging. That they noticed the cause, that was something special.
So here I am, waiting for my wings to unfold. I can't go forwards under my own power; I'm completely dependant on God. I never want to go back to who I was, living in this new knowledge of God is just incredible.
posted by Merlz at 7:02 AM
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